The truth

Ok, so for the 2 of you who read this regularly, you know the last post was tongue-in-cheek. I am the queen of sarcasm, if nothing else. I have blown the circumstances of what is going on at our church out of proportion to prove how silly we all can be. I will have to say, the vast majority of our church seems to be open to change and are doing whatever they can to stay positive and look ahead instead of looking at what once was. I’m proud of our pastor and our new worship leader. They are often in a no win situation and continue to rise above the petty fray. Yet, the fact that some of this stuff goes on has irritated me and got me thinking. Change is constant, so why do we resist it so much? The one thing that saddens me most is what we might be missing when we refuse to change. My husband has changed over the 22 years I have known him, and while there may be times he and I both wonder what happened to the people we married, we stick it out, work through it, and admire the people we have become instead of comparing who we are to who we were. Thank God my husband does that for me! My children change on a daily basis. Never once do I consider kicking them to the curb or putting them up for adoption (ok, maybe in a brief moment of weakness, but I get over it!). Change is going to happen in your life: your marriage; your job; yes, even your church. The way I see it, I have two choices when facing change. I can grasp on to what I know; what I refuse to change; what is comfortable and familiar. I can grip this with all my might and dig my nails into it and say “this is the right way and I’m not changing”…..and then shudder as I am dragged across the chalkboard of the inevitable changes in my life. Or I can stand, feet firmly planted, on the rock of my foundation. I can stand on the truths that I know and not be tossed by the wind and the waves. I’ve talked about it before, but I hate change. I don’t adapt well. The funny thing is though, the times I have felt closest to the Lord are the times he has plucked me from my nice warm bed of familiarity and thrown me into the icy waters of the unknown. It is then that I need him. It is then that I search him. It is then that I find him. It is then, and only then, that I am able to open my heart and my mind to what his plan is – not mine. It is only by being bounced around in the icy waters that I realize how small I am, and how big he is. That his plans are better than mine. The change in our worship routine has made me examine my own motives for Sunday morning. I’ll be honest, my motives are selfish at times. If our Senior pastor isn’t there, I’m apt to sleep in. I want to be moved; I want to hear from the Lord. But is that what worship is about? Honestly, no. Worship is not about me; it’s about Him. I know we worship in different ways, and I respect that. But when you come to church to be entertained, you’ve missed the point. Everyone has different reasons for attending church. They range from being able to teach children about Jesus to catching up with their friends. None of those things are necessarily wrong. Many of your needs can and should be met by your church. But your reasons for attending Sunday worship should have very little, if at all, to do with you. Worship is about God. Worship is designed to praise the God who made you, to worship the One who gave his life to save you. You should enter into worship with a thankful heart that the God of the universe knows your name and loves you beyond reasoning. When you walk into church with that in mind, does it really matter what the choir is wearing? We are no different than the Israelites marching through the desert. God released them from slavery in Egypt so they could worship him. Did you get that? So they could worship him. They were freed from slavery; had their freedom, yet, what did they do? Complained. Not only did they complain, they compared their current situation with their past. Catching any similarities here? They were free, and yet they whined that they wanted to go back to Egypt so they could eat well. If only they could have trusted God’s plan. If only they could have trusted their leaders. If only they could have stopped complaining for one minute and offered a praise of thanksgiving and a prayer for their leaders and their people. Maybe that’s what we all should do.

No choir robes for the 2nd week in a row! I’m done!

Our church is going through some changes, and I can honestly say, I don’t like them. First off, I have always enjoyed our “traditional” service at 11 a.m., but how can you honestly have a “traditional” service without the “traditional” choir robes? My father was a music minister and I will tell you right now, it is not biblical for people to be standing up in the choir loft praising our Lord in their jeans! For crying out loud! Where is the respect? Where is the reverence? You can’t have a proper service without robes. I can’t even look at all those people in the choir with all their mis-matched clothes; it’s very distracting. And don’t even get me started about the electric guitar. My word. What ever happened to our organ? The older people in our service don’t like it one bit. They shake their grey heads every time the music tarts. I am only 1 of about 6 people in that service under the age of 75 and it’s great. No young families with kids running around making noise other than my own. What am I going to do when all the old people go to a new church? I’m going to be stuck with people my own age – yuck. The new music minister is supposed to be voted in next week. Poor sap. He’d better wear a bullet proof vest and hire a body guard to watch out for him. Those old people may be slow, but they carry weapons. Next to change recently were the bulletins. My husband scoffs every time he sits down in the pew, looks at his bulletin, opens it up and then has to turn it sideways to read it. I personally don’t mind the new bulletins. The way they are folded makes an accordion like toy that our boys love to mimic during service, and I find it handy while making out my grocery list during the sermon (ho-hum). Speaking of the sermon, our pastor last week had the nerve to ask for a huge amount from what’s left of our congregation to update our sound system. Ah, hello, can you say RE-CES-SION!! With half our church leaving to “try out” the new church in Waxhaw, he’s lucky to get any money at all each week. Besides, between the older set with their hearing aides turned down and the Chinese ministry with translaters constantly talking over one another, no one can understand him anyway. It would be a total waste of money in my opinion. And speaking of the new church, who the heck came up with a dumb name like “Five Stones”? Can you imagine telling a stranger that’s where you attend? “Oh, you should check out Five Stones” Wha? The fact that it’s in Waxhaw is a joke. What? Those rich people in Waxhaw can’t drive their BMW’s to Matthews? Too far? Trust me, those people can’t be saved. Might as well save our resources to further educate us Christians who are already attending every Sunday. We have needs too. I guess all this means is that I am unhappy with the way things are going in our church. I’m not the only one. There are petitions to bring back the organ, kick out the pastor, get rid of the hymns and have a “wear your shorts to church on Sunday" once a month. The old folks are ticked off about the music because it's not what they are used to. The younger folks are heading to the loud, highlighted hair, swearing from the pulpit minister down the street because he uses flashy lights and cool music and makes them feel good about themselves. The in-betweens are heading to the new church because they need a change and don't realize how much work they are going to be asked to do. Where does that leave me? I think it’s time for me to try the church down the street. I hear they give biscuits to new visitors. I like biscuits and my church has never given me biscuits. It might be worth a shot. *for those of you reading this for the first time, please be sure and check out Part 2 entitled "The Truth" posted above.

Keeping your children safe on the computer

A while back we had a bird make a nest in our front yard. I couldn't tell what it was so I went searching the Internet. Innocently, I typed in "black and white striped bird". The first several pictures were exactly what I was searching for.....then there were a few that were NOT what I was searching for. Unfortunately, my 9 year old and his buddy were standing behind me when these images appeared. Not exactly porn came up, but certainly nothing I wanted my 9 year old to see. This really got me thinking. My children are on this computer a few times a week researching projects and playing games. All sites have already been looked at by me, but I started to wonder, what if they accidentally typed in the wrong word or letter? What could pop up? About a month ago, I was on Lysa Terkeurst's site and she was interviewing Clay Crosse. He is a Christian singer who has struggled in the past with pornography. I remember all the great advice he gave about his struggles, and since I am raising boys I didn't want to bury my head in the sand about this issue. I went to his site and found a great tool to block unwanted images and sites from our computer. He recommended BSafe and Covenant Eyes Internet filters. I bought BSafe and I must say, it's been great. I have to type in a password even to get to my People magazine page. It was done a great job at filtering unwanted ads (that even on Fox.com can be questionable for little eyes) without filtering the actual content of the site. If the site, however, is questionable, it blocks it and you have to put in a password. We also can put in a list of approved sites that will come up without a password. Of course, sites that are not questionable, like Charlotte.com and Playhousedisney come up without a problem. We always monitor the boys when they are on the Internet, but it makes me feel better knowing I have one more layer of protection for my family. I mean, if I can type in something innocently and something bad comes up, my boys are apt to do it as well.

Back by popular demand...Chore Charts!

They are not back by popularity as far as my children are concerned....but by me! Our summers are a lot easier with these charts - no nagging. It either gets done or there is a consequence. Takes a lot of pressure off of me. Here is where you can create one for your child: ChoreCharts. We have added a few things to each boys list. In addition to the normal stuff like making his bed and taking out the trash, David has to refill the fridge with drinks every night (not my wine of course!) :) and he's going to start doing his laundry once a week (we'll see how that goes). Jason now has to clean the bathroom every night and mop the floors once a week, in addition to the basics like brushing his teeth, picking up his toys, etc. These worked great last year and I am looking forward to putting them to use this week. The boys love checking things off their list and getting their reward for all their hard work at the end of the week. And I love that I am not nagging them to do things they should be thinking about doing every day.

My baby turns 9 today

Gosh, where did those years go? It's hard to believe that 9 years ago today I became a mom for the first time. What an awesome feeling holding my little boy after trying for so long to get pregnant. Truly there was a time I thought I would never become a mom. And now, I have a 9 year old and a almost 5 year old.

What a blessing David has been. He truly is the sweetest boy I know, and he makes me and his Dad proud every day. He loves to read and play his Nintendo, as well as hang out with his friends and play baseball. All he asked for his birthday was Lego's and that's what he got! He is truly the best son we could ask for, and the best brother Jason could have. What a great example to look up to.

He wanted to have his buddies after school to play ball at Davie Park for his birthday (sweet....and cheap!). They all had a great time eating pizza, playing kickball and whiffle ball and just hanging out. I am so proud of the boys David hangs out with. What a great group they are and their parents are awesome too!

Today, his actual birthday, was the last day of school (praise God!). What a great way to spend a birthday! He wanted to have lunch at Chuck E. Cheese and then come home and put his 1000 piece Lego set together. So that's what we are doing. We love you buddy! Happy 9th birthday! We couldn't be more proud to have you as a son!

Last day of WEE School

Today was Jason's last day of WEE school for the year. It was so sweet to see his teachers get emotional as they were handing out awards (yes, there were awards in preschool!) and saying goodbye to the children. This has been a wonderful year for Jase. He has had a few difficult times throughout the year, but I am so thankful he had teachers I felt comfortable talking things over with. They love him, and all the students, and I will forever be grateful for all they have done. God bless them for what they do! How fast that year went by! Off to TK!

40 is just a number...unless of course it's YOUR number!

I turn 40 today. I know, try to contain your shock. You thought I was only 29....(I can fantasize if I want to; it's MY birthday!) The number doesn't seem to bother me all that much; after all, it's just a number. But there is something about the passing of a decade of years you have lived that makes you look back on your life - and look ahead. I will never be in my 30's again.....ok, that moment of reflection has passed. Moving on. Looking back on my life I can honestly say I have few regrets. Sure, there are things I would have done differently. But if I went back to do some things over, and all the circumstances of that time still remained the same, I still would make the same choice. There are a few things I would like to go back and tell the girl of my youth though. To that 7 year old girl out in the front yard pretending to direct a "photo shoot" with all her friends doing action shots, I would whisper to always keep that imagination and love of life. Your bossy spirit will come in handy one day when you're trying to coax a 2 year old to go potty for the first time (the imagination part will help a lot too). To the insecure 12 year old whose heart is broken over girls she thought were her friends, I would tell to be strong. God has better friends in mind for you and is getting rid of these nasty girls for something much better. Friends that you will greatly need in the months to come that you can't foresee right now. To the 15 year old young lady who is complaining about her hair and her weight and her....wait, I still do that. I still would tell her to knock it off and enjoy the body God gave her.....like I am telling myself right now. It just gets worse as time goes by! To the 17 year old high school student who fell in love, I would tell her to not worry. The man you love who is going off to college is still going to be in love with you 23 years later. He still will be treating you like a princess and you still will be feeling you don't deserve him. And you will love him more in the future than you ever thought possible in high school. To the 26 year old who can't pull herself off the floor after the devastation of losing her dad, I would say to keep crying.....and that it really will be ok. God will show you He is still with you and your family. Through the tears and the grief and the anger at God, you will come to know Him in a way you never did before. God will bring joy back into your family. He hasn't left you, even though you feel so alone today. To the 30 year old who is ready to give up hope of ever being a mom I would say hang on! These boys are coming, and they are loud, and fun, and tiring and totally awesome. If I had to do these years over again I would have stressed less and prayed a lot more. I would worried less about what other people wanted me to do, and searched more of what God wanted me to do. I would have hugged my dad a lot. An awful lot. God has been so good to me. He has blessed me with a family I love and true friends I adore beyond words. I am reminded of the words the Lord spoke to me years ago. As I was putting together a scrapbook of my father to give to my son, the Lord whispered in my ear "Sherri, look at this wonderful life I gave your father. You have been focusing on his death; I want you to focus on his life". What beautiful words to change someones life. He did that for me that day. So today I am focusing on this great life God has given me so far. My prayer for this year is that I enjoy the life God has given me. May he challenge me in ways that make me depend only on Him. May he continue to bless our family and show his face to us each and every day. And may I continually strive to glorify him in all I do and think and all I say. Thank you Lord for 40 wonderful years. You are awesome and I love you. "The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever—do not abandon the works of your hands." Psalm 138:8