Something Radical

I was reading this article yesterday in the Observer about a woman who wanted to give her husband something unique and special for his 40th birthday. You can read it here. The gist of it is that she said "yes" to sex every night for an entire year. If I remember correctly, there still are 365 days in a year so that means she said yes....well, you get the picture. That's a lot....I mean, I'm no prude, but every day? Wow. My husband's 40th is coming up and I read him part of the article yesterday. He just looked at me and before his mind even went down that path I said "no way". But this article did get me to thinking. What she did is radical. Just the thought of it makes me tired, but she stuck to her commitment to do this for an entire year. It makes me wonder what I would commit myself to for an entire year, and what benefits would myself, my family, or those around me gain from such a commitment? What if I exercised every day for a year; ate healthy every day; cooked a wholesome meal for my family every day (yeah, right!). What if I just started simple, like doing something nice for my husband and my boys every day - and I couldn't count cleaning their dirty clothes as the "nice" thing. Maybe a little note for my husband or a special treat for my kids. It's too easy to get stuck in a rut, and most times you are the only one who can get yourself out of it. I think it's time for me to do something radical to change myself for the better. God expects us to be radical in our obedience to him and in our love for one another. I'm going to start today doing something radical. What is it going to be? You'll have to wait to find out! And no honey....it won't be what this lady did. Sorry.

My Favorite Things

I've been reading magazines lately that list a multitude of favorite things....from make up to fashion....and my friend Nancy posted a few of hers so I thought "Why Not!" Two of my favorite things are on her blog as well, the "Stay Put" head-bands available at Target - they really stay put! And the running skorts from Target as well. I have one from Dick's that cost me twice as much as the one from Target....and I like the Target one better! Skin & Hair Care: Oil of Olay Foaming Face Wash for Sensitive Skin. Available at Target as well. I went 2 days without this stuff and my face broke out horribly. Laura Mercier silk creme foundation - available at Belk's SouthPark. Use with a damp sponge to put on - it covers a multitude of blemishes. Lancome Defincil's Mascara in black - long lashes and no smudge. Aveda Damage Remedy shampoo and conditioner - for hair like mine, I need it. Available at local hair salons. Fashion: Claire's Accessories. You can't beat the selection and the prices. In malls everywhere. Jag Jeans or capri's found at Nordstrom's. These jeans fit my wide rear end and short legs better than anything! Liz Claiborne Outlets - I bought tops galore, a necklace and earrings for under $50. Concord Mills. Target....any clothes for me or my boys....including shoes....you can't beat them! Favorite Foods (my favorite category!): Anything from the Cheesecake Factory. Seriously. Anything. Chicken Fettuccine from Charley's at Cotswold. I ate there more when they were at SouthPark - but I'll drive to Cotswold any day to eat there! Yummy! Charles Shaw Chardonnay (otherwise known as 2 buck Chucks) at Trader Joes Little Bites 100 calorie packs from Entenmann's (just have to hide them from the family...they are that good) at HT Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing - good for you food always tastes better swimming in this! Tuna Sandwich and Tea from McAlisters (I think I like this from the company (Nancy!) I have when eating it, but the sandwich is good too!) I'm sure I'll think of more, but that's it for now. Wow, is it any wonder why I am overweight?!

Being Intentional

The Lord has been beating me over the head with these two words the last few days. "Ok, Lord, I get it. I get it!" I can think of a laundry list of things that I need to be intentional about that I am not: spending time with the Lord, my families eating habits, guiding my children.....the list could go on. Yesterday I had the privilege of seeing many of my friends dedicate their children to the Lord at our church. It was a beautiful ceremony where 32 babies were dedicated to the Lord. (Is it any wonder why we need a new student building?) Our preschool director talked about how we, as parents, have the ultimate responsibility to guide our children. How easy it is to rely on church and school to do our work for us. To be intentional with the future of our children. I needed to hear those words again. I know that my husband and I are responsible for our boys, and I feel we do a pretty good job at guiding them. But there is always room for improvement. We live in an area where children are pushed and pushed at a very young age, and it breaks my heart to see these young children burned out by the time they are 10. Seeing this every day I tend to head in the opposite direction. But there has to be a balance. Constant prayer for what the Lord has planned for our boys, and praying we always lead them on His path of where He wants them to be is key. "Lord, help me to be intentional in following your will and seeking you each day, for myself and my family."

Who What When

Where is your cell phone? In my purse Your significant other? Sleeping. Your hair? really bad. Ready for bed hair (not quite as bad as bed head, but close) Your mother? Charlotte, NC Your father? with Jesus Your favorite thing? my husband Your dream last night? something MOPS related; can't remember exactly (scary) Your favorite drink? McAlister's Tea 1/2 sweet, 1/2 unsweet - yes I am high maintenance when it comes to my tea. Your dream/goal? eat healthy and love it. The room you’re in? office Your ex? thank God there isn't one. Your fear? losing my husband or boys. Where do you want to be in 6 years? less fearful, more joyful, content and wiser. Where were you last night? eating dinner at Tony Roma's with my family after a quick run to Dick's sports for baseball pants for my oldest. What you’re not? outgoing Muffins? yes - muffin top, banana nut muffins which leads to my muffin top One of your wish list items? can't think of anything I want that I don't already have Where you grew up? Pennsylvania The last thing you did? typed Pennsylvania and wondered if I spelled it right! What are you wearing? Pajamas Your TV? not on Your pets? none. two boys are enough to clean up after Your computer? HP Your life? very, very blessed Your mood? tired, but content Missing someone? my dad Your car? Toyota van (something I swore I would never, ever drive) Something you’re not wearing? make up, shoes, jewelry Favorite store? Barnes & Noble Your summer? unscheduled with lots of pool time Your favorite color? pink in general, black for clothes When is the last time you laughed? this afternoon at my son Last time you cried? can't remember Who will repost this? hopefully all my friends

Ahhhhhh.....CHOOOOOOO!

I have been sneezing my head off all day today. I'm not sure if it's something in this apartment or something outside and it just hits me when I get inside. I swear I have sneezed 100 times today! I did run with my friend Nancy today. It was beautiful weather and thankfully I didn't sneeze once during our run. I am making pot pie for dinner since DH will be home and will be tired after a long meeting last night. I love to be able to feed him well when he's home and pot pie is one of his favorites. If anyone knows what is blooming right about now, leave me a comment. I'd love to know what is causing all my misery!

A much needed break

So, as I posted earlier, Spring break was last week for my kids. We had a great week, busy as it was, and on Friday my mother in law and I headed off to Charleston. Yes, you read it right, my mother in law. We have never done something like this, just the two of us and it was wonderful! No husbands, no kids; just her and I, our suitcases, debit cards and some funny movies to watch. We got down to Charleston Friday late afternoon and stayed until Sunday night. We shopped 'til we dropped and ate until we popped! We shopped in downtown Charleston and had much better luck at the outlet shops (which I love). We ate fantastic food and had the best pizza in Mt. Pleasant the night before we left. It was fun to stay up late and laugh and crash from exhaustion. It was a great time and gave us some much needed time away. I am so thankful to have a mother in law like her. She raised a terrific son and she's one of the easiest people to be around. God gave me a mother by birth and a mother by marriage and I am so thankful to have spent the weekend with her. Upon my return, my husband and our boys had gone to the mountains to play in the last snowfall of the season. They went sledding and snowboarding and had a great time together and my son got another day off from school. They didn't come back until Monday afternoon, so I had yet another day to myself to sleep in, unpack and go for a run. Being away from my family and out of our routine always makes me thankful to come back home to them. I hated sending them off to school today, but summer will be here before I know it.........and by then I'll need another break!

Roller Coaster Ride

When I was growing up, we lived within driving distance to an amusement park. I remember when I was old enough to go there with friends....without parents.....how much fun we would have. My friends and I would spend a lot of our summers there using our season's passes. Back then I could get on any roller coaster without taking an obscene amount of Dramamine (like I have to now). My friends and I would wait in long lines in the sweltering heat to get on the biggest and fastest ride in the park. We'd wait there without complaining. When we got closer to getting on the ride, we'd split up two by two in the turnstiles, our anxiety expressed in giddy laughter. If one of us would start to have second thoughts, the rest of us would encourage our friend to continue. If they just couldn't, one of us would stay behind with her and skip the ride. The best part of the ride for me was the beginning and the end. I loved getting in the seat and hearing the teenager at the control announce "keep your hands and legs in the ride at all times. Stay seated as the safety bar comes down". My heart would start pounding as the bar came down and locked into place. My friends and I would look at each other smiling as we raised our hands in the air after hearing the brakes give way. Off we went! There would be screams of fear and laughter as we flew through the ride, and it was over almost as quickly as it had begun. As we'd pull into the station and stopped, the safety bar would come up and we would tumble out , our knees weak from excitement and we'd laugh out loud all the way down the exit ramp. How much my life resembles that roller coaster of my childhood. The excitement of trying something new, the ups and downs of life that send my stomach to my throat, the sheer joy of being worried about something I was getting into, only to see it come to an end and be thankful I accomplished it. And through it all is that safety bar. The thing that keeps me from falling off the ride; secures me in place and makes me feel safe. Jesus parallels the safety bar in my life. I feel him tightening his arms around me when I am anxious or afraid at the beginning of something big; I grab onto him when the ride of life gets to be too much and I feel like I'm falling off, and when the ride comes to an end I can look back and see how much he kept me. Thank you Jesus for being my safety bar. Thank you for keeping me secure even when I don't feel you some days, much less acknowledge you. Thank you for sending people around me to encourage me to get on the ride and laugh with me through it. And thank you for all the ups and downs of this roller coaster we call life.

April 11th is special

Today, 22 years ago, my husband and I had our first date. We always celebrate this day as it was the beginning of a great life God has blessed us both with. We were both still in high school, and although we knew each other, today was the first day we actually went on a date. Bowling if I remember correctly. Of course, our dating anniversary would have been earlier if our first date went off as planned. You see, the first time we were supposed to go bowling we missed each other. I went to where I thought we were supposed to go, as did he, but we never could find each other. I went to another bowling ally thinking I had mistakenly wrote down the wrong one - he did the same. Still we couldn't find each other. (This was before cell phones where we could have called each other). My mother, who was driving me all over the place, had her doubts about this man who would become my husband. When I got home, he called and asked where I had been. We still don't know how we missed each other - looking back I wonder if this was the first of many times the enemy would try to keep us apart - but thankfully this night didn't deter either one of us. We scheduled another date for the 11th and the rest of history.....that is still being written. To my sweet husband: Thanks for seeing the beauty in me behind the crooked teeth, scraggly hair, low self esteem of a young teenager who reeked of gasoline because of her cheap VW bug. How you ever fell in love with me then can only be called a miracle.

A slow week that turned busy

This week started off slow and easy - which was fantastic (as I have already posted), but now it has gotten busy. Turns out I ended up working the last 2 days and will work again at probably 2 days next week. Feel sorry for me would you.....just kidding. My life is great and I love being able to work when they need me. But this week I was sitting at home, minding my own business when one person in my office had heart trouble, another had family illness and voila....my days are changed. That's how life is isn't it? You think you have it all figured out - when you're going to get married, have kids, go on vacation, finish school, retire and then something, or someone, alters your plans. We always think we can control 100% of our lives 100% of the time. It's never that way, we only kids ourselves when we think that. We control very little of our lives and when we do things under control we should be thankful, for the next speed bump in our road is just up ahead. So today as I leave the office, I am thankful to have these people to work with. I am thankful to have had 3 glorious days with my kids doing nothing. I am thankful that my one friend here at work is doing well enough to come back for a little while. I am especially thankful for a husband who fills in the gaps in my absence without complaining and actually enjoys it. I am truly thankful for him. I also thank God for always being in control of all things - 100% of the time.

Spring Break

Today is one of those days where I feel a slight pang of guilt for the wonderful life my God has blessed me with. The boys are on Spring Break this week and we are enjoying sleeping in and having very little on the schedule. Today both boys hopped in my bed after their dad went to work and we laid there and watched cartoons before getting up for breakfast. I loved watching their almost identical faces as they lay there on the pillow. Were my oldest's face not 4 years older, their features are exactly the same. After breakfast they did some drawing while I got some work done then we headed outside. One of the great things about living closer in town is that everything is within walking - or biking - distance. The boys got on their bikes while I walked and we went up the road to get a burger and then ice cream. Another added blessing was Tuesday is buy one get one free kids scoop at Cold Stone - yummy! They rode around while I sat and watched, occasionally getting up to help the youngest when his training wheels got stuck. He looks so cute peddling his little heart out while that back wheel just spins and spins. We rode back to the apartment and I let the boys ride their bikes some more while I read a book on the front porch. Right now we are resting and then it's off to swimming lessons. I truly love being a mom and having a husband who likes me calling him to say thanks for days like this. Had he been here to enjoy it with me, it would have been the perfect day. Even so, it was fantastic!

Goal Achieved!

A few weeks ago I set a goal to run the distance around my neighborhood (3.7 miles) before I turned 39 in May. Today I surpassed that goal with 4.2 miles. I can't believe I ran that far, but I did and I am so happy. My next goal will be to just increase my time as I run. We had a great day today. Church, then lunch at my moms, then we went and helped her pick out a flat screen t.v. My husband joked that our parents both actually beat us to buying the flat screens as we still have our old t.v., but it was great to see my mom get something so nice for her place. The Lord has blessed her financially this year and I am so happy to see her being able to shop for things without stress. God does hear our prayers.

Hold my hand

When our boys were toddlers and starting to show signs of being able to walk, my husband and I would help them. We would sit on the floor about 4 feet apart from each other and one of us would have our son standing in front of us with our hands around their body. I remember how excited they were to have the full attention of both parents on their level. Their whole bodies would be bouncing up and down and their legs would go from stick straight to jello. When they finally calmed down a little, I would then move my hands up to hold our son's hands and start to help him walk. I remember those tiny fingers gripping tightly onto my one finger as we started to take a few steps. Eventually I would start to pry my finger out of his tiny grip to see if he could walk on his own. Most of those first steps were bouncing movements that eventually ended up with him on the floor landing on his bottom. Sometimes he would lean forward and Daddy would catch him; other times he would just sit down, but eventually he got it. My oldest always wanted to hold my hand wherever we went. He found comfort in knowing I was there and needed to feel my presence. My youngest never wants to hold my hand. Even in a crowded parking lot, that child will pitch a royal fit when I make him hold onto me. It's only when he gets scared that he wants to feel me beside him, and that's ok. My children are at the age now that they would rather not hold my hand, and eventually we will get to the stage where they probably don't want to be seen with me when they are around their friends. I am amazed that someone they needed so badly to grasp onto to walk, they will soon not want to be seen with. How often I can be like my sons with my own Heavenly Father. When I am facing something that scares me, or I know I can't do on my own, I grasp on to Him tightly. I read his word, I talk to him; my fingers are gripping him so tightly they are white. As He directs me through a difficult time, I feel confidence and eventually feel like I can walk on my own. It's human nature to gain confidence through situations so that you can tackle bigger things. I want my children to feel confident enough to let go of my hand (as sad as it makes me). What I don't want them to ever do, is think they can let go of God's hand. They will take that lesson from me. Whether things are going smoothly or we're in a rough patch, I always want them to see me holding on to the Father for wisdom, guidance and protection. Confidence will never replace the love of a Father. "I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings. " Psalm 61:4

I'm starving!!!!!! and other complaints about running....

After starting this running program there are a few complaints I have: 1. I am hungry all the time. Not just "oh, I really would like to eat something". No. I am hungry like "I'm going to Five Guys at 10:30 a.m. to pound on the door until they open and feed me." I want a double cheeseburger and the large fries....for myself please. It is awful. I could eat all day long. Not good. 2. I'm gaining weight. Now I've worked out enough years to know that you build muscle before you lose weight....blah, blah, blah. But it still doesn't ease my frustration after a 3.4 mile run to get on the scale the next morning and see that another pound has been added. And yes, I know that the eating all day is not helping. Don't remind me. 3. Aches and pains. It's bad enough that I need to take Advil after I run, but I now am having to take it before I go. Nothing like feeling like a Grandma at 38. Even after all the belly-aching (and yes, that part of my body is getting bigger too), I still am happy to run. My friend Nancy and I have done something we never thought possible - run more than a mile without passing out. I'm proud to have gotten this far and weight gain and all, I'm going to keep going. 3.4 miles again today!

Trick's aren't all that funny to some people

My son had an absolute blast yesterday for April fool's day. I think he got all his friends and me as well. Telling people their flies were down as they came out of the bathroom and that their shoelaces were untied at the playground was a lot of fun for him at school. The worst, though, he saved for me. I was at the church preparing for a meeting when my oldest and one of his friends needed to go to the bathroom. They went and took their younger siblings with them down the hall. When he came back I asked if everything went ok, he whispered in my ear "yeah, but the worst part was that jc (what he calls his younger brother) pooped and didn't wipe his bottom". I immediately said "What!". Oh no, I thought. He was in his swimming trunks ready for swimming lessons so a million thoughts ran through my head "how am I going to clean that up?; what am I going to say to my husband who is on his way to take them to swimming?" As my mind was swirling, my son grinned and yelled "April fools!!!" I could have killed him. He gets this horrible character trait from his father. On my drive home late last night from my meeting, I remembered a time when my husband and I were first married. I went from living with my parents to married and living with him, so I was not used to being by myself. Unfortunately for us, my husband's job required travel, so from the time we were first married he was gone from Sunday night to Friday night. One Friday I came home from work around 6:30 p.m. and was expecting him around 8:30 p.m. or so. I walked through our apartment like I always did, checking under every bed, behind every door and shower curtain. It was a routine I had and I couldn't relax until it was done and I was sure no one was in our apartment. Now, I never expected to ever find anyone, it just made me feel better. So on this particular night, I went through the apartment and finished up in our bedroom, looking under our bed. Much to my horror, this time when I checked, there was a man. He was quietly waiting under our bed for God know's what. After my immediately shock wore off, I realized it was my husband. He still to this day thinks it was funny. I, however, do not. I still hold that over his head whenever I want new clothes.

3.4...count 'em....3.4 miles!

Today my friend Nancy and I ran 3.4 miles! I am so proud of us. I have never run that far in my life and it felt great to get in the car and clock how far it was. It was so exciting. I have learned some profound lessons in the last month since I started running again. First, you've got to start somewhere (as my friend Danna Jean said). You just don't hop off the couch and run a marathon, you've got to begin with small steps and build on it. Second, keep your eyes on the path in front of you, not the entire distance. If Nancy and I had picked a spot to run to today, I doubt we would have made it. We just kept running and when we felt we had pushed ourselves as far as we wanted, we headed back. We knew approximately how far we had gone, and certainly how long we had been running and that was enough. Goals are great and you should have them, but be flexible. Today was a great day!