At home

Like most things, if I don't stay on top of it I get behind. I was amazed when I went to post this morning that it has been over a week since my last post! Yikes! I had every intention of taking an aerobics class this morning - even packing all my stuff to shower at church afterwards - and my youngest felt sick on the way there. So we're home where I will make every attempt to get a good workout in at here - although nothing beats Jenny's class at our church. I always feel great after that! The house is still up for sale and I feel sure it will sell if it is what the Lord wants for our family. I can honestly say we have no plan for now. I am taking each day as it comes and praying for wisdom and "light" for our steps as they come. I don't know what the Lord has planned for the coming weeks and months, but for right now we are taking it day by day. This is hard for me as I am a planner. The fact that my house is on the market and we have no idea what we are going to do when it sells is a huge step of faith for me. I do trust the Lord, and I guess that is why I don't really feel led to pray for anything else but His perfect will for our lives. We did have a family see it on Saturday, but otherwise it has been painfully slow. I am grateful that we don't have to sell it quickly - what an unbelievable stress that would be in this market. But at least the house is always clean and ready to show! Well I'm off to the elliptical machine while my little one is on the couch watching the new (old) Jungle Book movie. They actually quote scripture in that film. Ah, the good 'ol days!

Lazy Saturdays

I don't know what it is about having something on the calendar that gets cancelled at the last minute that gives me a sense of euphoria - but it does (is that a hint that maybe I am over-scheduled?). Today was one of those days. My son normally has a baseball game, but this Saturday my husband had already booked him for a golf clinic that couldn't be cancelled. We could have made the game but my son would have been worn out doing both. We opted to sleep in this morning and go to the golf thing only. It was awesome! My husband made paper airplanes with the oldest, while I and the youngest curled up on the couch under a blanket and watched Winnie the Pooh. He fell asleep and is still there now. As a matter of fact, I think I'll go join him in that nap! Man I love mornings like this!

God is in the small things

"Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." Luke 6:28 My oldest is in 2nd grade and has been having some issues during recess with his classmates. They have been playing football and there are a few boys that control the plays and leave several boys out - mine included. It's not that they don't choose him to play, it's that he never gets thrown the ball. This has gone on for a couple weeks, but yesterday my son was so bothered by it he wouldn't eat his dinner and finally broke down crying and told me how hurt he was. He went so far as to ask me to take him back to school so we could hide the football so they wouldn't have to play the next day. I prayed for wisdom and searched his devotional book for a topic that would address this (and no we didn't hide the football!). Thankfully the Lord gave me the devotional entitled "Prayers for Friends" from the "Gotta Have God" devotional. This particular devotion was about boys who were being mean. My son's friends were not being mean, just controlling and competitive - like some kids are. That's ok, unless you are on the receiving end of it and then it's not too fun. But as we read the devotional last night, I explained to him that there were many professional football players who never touch the football - most of them in fact. He had two choices - he could play with his friends - whether they passed the ball to him or not - to the best of his ability, and try and intercept the ball or play the best defense he could. Or he could play with his other friends who were not playing the game at all. It was his choice. At the end of our devotion time, I asked him to pray to God for recess tomorrow, and to pray for his friends. His prayer went something like this "Lord, please hide the football tomorrow so we won't have to play". Ok, not exactly what I was after, but that is what his heart felt so I didn't say anything. I went on to finish our prayer time praying for wisdom for my son to make the right choice during recess the next day. The next day I prayed for him all morning, and even drove by the playground when I thought he would be there. They had already gone in, but one of the boy's moms was outside and we talked for a bit (nothing major - but definitely God ordained that she was there). Later that day when my son came home, I asked him how recess went. He nonchalantly said that they had played soccer - they couldn't find the football. He went on to tell me what great plays he made defensively and as a goalie - he was so excited! That night during our devotion time, I reminded him that he had a lot to thank God for. That the God who created the universe thought of him today and helped him to have a great recess. So during his prayer, he thanked God for getting rid of the football. I secretly thanked Him too.

The mind of a 3 year old!

I love picking my 3 year old up from preschool. The discussion about his day that follows on the ride home is one of my favorite times of the week. Today he was showing me how baby sharks bite (by taking his forefinger and thumb and pressing them together) and how big sharks bite (by taking his whole arms and closing them together). After the shark lesson, he said he prayed to God today. I asked him what he prayed to God about and he replied "Jesus". (That is pretty much his standard answer after any Sunday School or preschool morning when I ask him what he learned about). Then he asked "How does Jesus get in my heart?" I told him all he has to do is ask Jesus and Jesus will come into his heart and stay with him forever. It was quiet for a minute, then he gasped "but I don't have a pocket on my shirt!" After I suppressed my giggles I told him he didn't need a pocket. "But how will I walk around with Jesus in me?" Knowing full well I was being outwitted by my toddler, I told him when he was older we could talk about it and he would understand it. "No" he replied "I want to talk about it now, Mommy." So I said something along the philosophical lines of "he gets smaller to come into your heart". (A theologian I am not!) That seemed to suffice, for now. These conversations are coming up more and more lately with both my children. My 7 year old can understand better the full weight of the decision to follow Christ, where my 3 year old can't just yet. How grateful I am that he attends a preschool where he knows already, at age 3, that Jesus loves him and wants to be in his heart! What an awesome gift.

Sweet Sounds

My 3 year old has the cutest habit of singing and talking himself to sleep. Last weekend while I was away, my husband caught him on the couch singing "Mommy will be home on Saturday" over and over again. Tonight, I can hear him as I type singing talking to his stuffed "doggy" as he calls him. He's saying "I love you doggy; but I love Grandma too". "I love day-day (his nickname for older brother)" Now he is just humming. How I wish I could box those sounds up and carry them with me wherever I go!

Dropping the defense shield

I will be the first to tell you I do not have the perfect marriage. I have a terrific husband that I am thankful for, but we have been together for 20 years and there have been a lot of growing pains over that time. But even after 20 years together, I still find myself puzzled that I keep making the same mistakes over and over again (him too). The other day we had a conversation over the phone about an issue that has been a recurring one for the last several months. You know those conversations don't you? The ones that keep coming up so often you might as well record them and just say to each other - "stop! roll tape". I knew when it began where it was going and it started in it's normal way: topic brought up, I get defensive, he gets defensive, I get louder, he tells me not to yell, etc., etc. But this time something changed. I don't know whether I was just tired from a long day, or maybe I just didn't want to have the same conversation again, but right at the time I usually am getting angrier, I let my guard down. I literally felt my body ease up, my grip on the phone lessen, and I took a deep breath and said what I really felt (pain) instead of what I wanted him to think I was feeling (anger). Even though we were on the phone, he could feel my pain without even seeing my expression. There was a long pause, he said he was sorry, so did I, and the conversation took a better turn. Things have been different since then too. Anger, for me, is usually a direct result of pain or some deeper emotion that I just don't want to have to acknowledge. If I take the time to dig a little deeper, and let my guard down long enough to express it to the right person, it usually gets resolved. If not, it will fester and grow and before long will turn me into something I don't recognize anymore. I am thankful that the Lord has such patience with me. Even when I am angry with Him, He knows the underlying cause, even if I don't. And given enough time, He usually helps me find my way.

Germs everywhere!

The stomach bug is going around and as I write this, I am praying the Lord protects us from it. My dear friend Sarah's little girl was hospitalized last week because of it. As I was driving from preschool to home, the Lord prompted me to visit them. I started to argue...."but Lord, I can't subject my family to that horrible virus, she'll understand". "I'll protect you" was all I heard, so I turned around and headed to the hospital. I was thankful we got to see her and my youngest brought her little one a praying doll, which she loved. Sunday we went to a birthday party for a family friend - their oldest is my son's best friend, their youngest turned 3 and is a good friend of my youngest. We got there and heard that their oldest was sick upstairs with a virus. We hadn't been there 30 minutes when the grandmother came downstairs and announced that their son had just thrown up. Great. They played baseball together on Saturday, so we had already been subjected to it, but nevertheless I felt nauseous just being that close to it. I know I am overly cautious when it comes to illness, especially the stomach virus. I have found other moms like me, and then some the complete opposite. Now my dear friend yesterday had no idea her son had a stomach bug. If she did, I doubt she would have let 20 adults and all their children in her home. But I know of several who will send their kids to school, or still carry on with parties, work, whatever, knowing full well they could make others sick. That is what drives me nuts! If you are reading this I am not talking to you. If you were like that we would not be friends! Just kidding....not really. Anyway, keep praying no one in your family gets this bug - it's nasty.