2008 - What's in store?

As I begin to write down the goals I want to accomplish for 2008, I am reminded of how I felt a week or so ago. My husband and our oldest were in NY visiting family, my youngest was spending the night at Grandma and Grandpa's and I was enjoying a much needed evening out with one of my best friends. It was the first time I could remember not having someone waiting for me. I could stay out as late as I wanted, do whatever I wanted, didn't have anyone calling me or waiting up for me. To be honest, it was great! I thoroughly enjoyed dinner and shopping and coffee and talking and laughing with my friend. On the drive home though I felt sad. Strangely not sad that no one was waiting for me, but sad that I had re-connected with myself and how much I missed that girl. I was incredibly sad that I had forgotten there was a Sherri in here somewhere. For just a few hours I wasn't in the capacity of being a wife or a mom or daughter or Room mom. I was just me. No other responsibilities other than what I - and only I - wanted to do. I got home and stayed up until 2 a.m. watching late night t.v. and wrapping all, yes all, of our Christmas presents. I enjoyed snacks and a glass or two of wine while I sat on the floor giddy at how excited our boys were going to be over their presents. But I haven't forgot about how I felt on the way home, and so, as I begin this New Year I am determined to find moments during the day, and week, to reconnect with myself and what I enjoy. I know that if I do this, I will be a much happier person which will make me a much better wife and loving mother. My first goal for this year was actually suggested to me by our church counselor over 9 months ago - find time each week to be by yourself. No writing grocery lists, or running errands. Do something you like to do for yourself. I honestly tried - twice - to do it when he suggested it and then life took over. So starting this week, I am going to get a good book, go to my favorite bagel place and for an hour (or more) once the kids are at school I will read. I love to read and I have really missed it. I am hoping taking this important step will help me do all the others. My second goal is just as important as my first, to reconnect with my heavenly father. This has to be a daily thing for me and I have bought a notebook to just write down prayer lists and other daily events. This notebook will give me a great indication of how well I am doing in my prayer life as well as other things. The next is obviously my health. As I get depressed or lonely, food is my comfort. It shows. My thoughts about that have to change, and as they do, my weight will too. I feel better when I work out and my goal is to take an aerobics class once a week and then the elliptical machine 2 times a week. This won't happen though unless I do step 1 and 2. My thoughts of food have to change and the only way I know to do that is to fast. I am praying about when to fast and for how long, but I have done it before when my thoughts of food get out of line and it's the only way I know to get them right again. No food, no matter how great, can take the place of Jesus. Our life is in upheaval now and I will openly admit here that I am not handling it well. I don't like change and instead of standing on my rock I am shifting with the sand - and eating lots of chocolate along the way. I know the only way to weather this storm is to hold tight to Jesus. It's my only way through. My other goals will come as I spend more time in prayer of what the Lord wants me to do. More dates with my husband, more patience with my kids are on the short list (and always remain there), spending more time with my brother and extended family too, but how to do it I am still working out. I do know for sure that once May rolls around I will be taking a much needed break, but instead of waiting until then I am making steps now to improve. My husband and I each take a weekend -separately - to pray and spend time with the Lord. We will be doing that in the upcoming months as there are many decisions we have to make that affect our future. I look forward to sharing with you then what the Lord has given me.